An old friend sent me a photo the other day. There is no getting around this one.
Jack Schell and I worked together at KVIL. He’d demur, but Jack is probably the smartest, most brilliant man I’ve ever known. He’s one of the best on-air talents. He’s one of the most creative. He’s one of the most multifaceted. Among other things, he’s a fantastic photographer. I love him even though he once tried to kill me by taking me down a black diamond ski run in Steamboat Springs. But I sure wish he’d been smart enough to just delete this photo.
If you were born after the Cowboys last won a Super Bowl, ask your parents about acid washed jeans. Once I saw this I immediately texted it to my children. I knew one day it would come out at the funeral anyway, so it was best they heard it straight from me. I added this note: This is why I’ve never complained much about your fashion choices.
I mean, the whole ensemble, really. That’s radio legend Ron Chapman on the left, the late, great TV news anchor Chip Moody behind, and KVIL’s dear Teri Richardson behind me. I think it may have been taken at one of our infamous tugs-of-war across the Trinity River at Fort Worth’s annual Mayfest, but I’m not certain. What I do know is the other people in that boat should have thrown me in the water and held me under.
Yellow Margaritaville shirt. Golf cap. Those pants. I was probably wearing Kaepa double-lace up hi-tops. Were there no mirrors in our house? I’m just glad no one has found early-80s photos of me in parachute pants (so far). I dressed like a mall extra in Weird Science.
But I ask: what awful thing do you wish you’d never worn? Is there a puffy shirt you’ve never confessed? That really wrong pair of whatever that you loved in the store but hope to Sweet Baby Jesus your offspring never see?
Because as bad as that little number was, I also had this. With matching pants.
Actually wore that backstage to a Beach Boys concert. Mike Love refused to have his photo made with me. Ever see how he used to dress?
One of my favorite occasions in high school was dressing up for our annual Fifties Day. My daughter’s middle school had Nineties Day. Up until Jack sent me that photo I could just pretend the brain cells from that decade were gone. Almost got away with it, too.
But those pants.
Next time? Skinny jeans. #whatwasIthinking?